No Way Back (Mia's Way, #1) Read online

  No Way Back

  Mia’s Way, #1

  By Chloe Adams

  http://chloeadams.com/

  Cover design by Eden Crane Design

  http://www.EdenCraneDesign/

  Kindle edition

  Content warning: This novel deals with the sensitive issue of rape and its aftermath. Some of the material may therefore disturb younger readers and is intended for mature teens and older.

  No Way Back copyright 2012 by Chloe Adams

  Cover design copyright 2012 by Eden Crane

  All rights reserved.

  No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means including information storage and retrieval systems, without permission in writing from the author. The only exception is by a reviewer, who may quote short excerpts in a review.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

  You can follow Chloe on Twitter:

  @ChloeAdamsBooks

  Twitter hashtags:

  #newadult, #yalit, #romance, #ya #miasway

  Chapter One

  I can hardly hear my bestie’s voice over the techno music filling the backyard of the party. I press the phone against my ear. She’s talking, but I have no idea what she’s complaining about this time.

  “Wait, Ari!” I shout then step carefully around the glowing pool in my stilettos. It’s almost too dark to see the ground, and I’m not exactly steady on my feet after a few drinks. Only when I make it to the side of the house opposite the pool can I hear her whining. “Okay, back.”

  “How could you wear that dress?” she demands. “You promised we’d wear our new ones on the same night! It’s not fair, Mia!”

  “You were supposed to be here,” I remind her. I roll my eyes as she bitches and pick at a flake of crimson lipstick irritating my lip. When she’s done, I egg her on. “I wore my new heels, too.”

  “Bitch!” Arianna Stevens – my best friend and daughter of Daddy’s biggest financial supporter – gives a noisy sigh. “Is it fun at least?”

  “It’s okay. It’s more fun when you’re here,” I tell her. “There’s no dancing and they card me every time I get a drink.”

  “Oohhh, well … spill!” Her voice lowers, as if someone might hear her words. Knowing what she’s about to ask, I look around to make sure I’m totally alone. “How is the ID working?”

  “Like a charm. Just call me …” I dig it out of my wristlet “Judy Davis.”

  “Omigod, what an awful name!”

  “Wait, Julie Davis.” The pic is of me, but the age listed is twenty-nine, while I’m seventeen.

  Arianna laughs. “How much did you drink already?”

  “I don’t know. A few. All the guys here came with dates. This is no fun without you,” I complain.

  “Did anyone from school show?”

  “Nope.”

  “Lame. I so wish I was there. You have no idea how boring this is.”

  “Um, yeah, I do. I went to that awful one on the Fourth of July, two weekends ago.”

  Ari’s dad forced her to go to a fundraiser tonight, which is where I should be, since it’s for Daddy. But I hate those things, and I hate being displayed like one of Daddy’s army medals. Especially tonight, after my half-sister announced she’s getting married - to the man Daddy told her to. She’s always been his favorite, like a dog who fetches a newspaper.

  I’m not his pet. I’m not wasting my Saturday night smiling for the press or making small talk with fake people who use me to get to Daddy. They can have Daddy for all I care, especially after how he shipped Mom away.

  My mind is buzzing from the alcohol, and the cool summer night does nothing to chill my body despite my tight mini-dress. It isn’t something Daddy would approve of, which is why I bought it and why I’m wearing it tonight. The only time he pays attention to me is when I screw something up.

  I realize Ari’s been talking and I’ve heard none of it. I’m too angry at him again.

  “… when it’s over, okay?” she says.

  “Wait, what?”

  “I said, call me when the party’s over. Your daddy doesn’t care if you make it back alive, but I do!”

  “You just want to make sure I give you back your purse!” I retort and look down at the red snakeskin wristlet she lent me.

  “Omigod, I’m so not like your fashionista mama, who’s holed up in rehab right now!”

  “I know. I wish I was there with her.” I frown. Daddy told the press Mom is on an extended vacay then distracted them with the news of my half-sister’s engagement. Not one of them would notice Mom and I aren’t at the fundraiser tonight, after that news.

  “Go have another round of drinks. This is soooo painful. It won’t be over soon,” Ari says. “Call me when you leave, k?”

  “K.” I hang up without saying good-bye then consider calling her back to end the conversation like normal.

  My head is buzzing too much to think twice, and I walk back to the pool area. It’s packed with guests, mostly the college-aged kids of diplomats and politicians. A foreign diplomat left for a trip, and his son, Sven, invited Ari to party with him for the weekend. Ari got ordered to the fundraiser, and I decided to come on my own.

  I’m bored already an hour after arriving. Without Ari, most parties are lame. Besides, this isn’t our kind of party. None of our friends are here, and it’s too big.

  I go to the bartender by the pool, who thankfully doesn’t card me this time, and get another vodka cranberry. It’s tart and burns my throat as I drink it. I stand to the side and look around at the unfamiliar faces, almost ready to leave, when I see one I recognize.

  Robert … Connor. My mind eventually pulls his name free. I don’t realize I’m staring at him until he looks over and meets my gaze. From what little I remember, he’s a college quarterback whose father is the head of another political dynasty and one of Daddy’s long-time allies. I’ve met Robert a few times, but not in the past several years, since he went off to college. I definitely don’t remember him looking like that!

  Does he recognize me? I don’t know. He’s staring back at me.

  I look down at my drink. He’s with a small group, two girls and three guys. Whichever girl is his girlfriend is lucky. He used to be tall and skinny, but he’s tall and muscular now, with his daddy’s Hollywood looks and his mother’s blue eyes.

  Lost again in my thoughts, I don’t notice he’s standing beside me until he clears his throat. I jump and look up into those eyes.

  “Hey,” he says.

  “Hey,” I reply. My heart is already somersaulting at how close he is. Ari would kill for the blond-haired, blue-eyed college hunk!

  “I feel like I know you?” he asked.

  I shrug. “Your dad’s a politician, right?”

  “Oh, god!” He rolls his eyes. “Don’t tell me – you hate his politics! I run into more disgruntled people at parties than anywhere else.”

  I giggle and shake my head, having run into people like that at other parties. Usually, Ari and I laugh them off and drink. Robert doesn’t seem to remember me, or he’d know my daddy isn’t from The Other Camp.

  “I’m so sick of politics,” he goes on. “It’d be a shame to know I couldn’t see someone as beautiful as you because your father votes for someone other than mine.” He smiles, and dimples appear in his cheeks.

  My face feels even hotter than it already is. He’s checking me out, and I straighten out of my slouch, as Mom always tells me to. Suck in my gut, pull back my shoulders, sexy pose. Just like Mom – a
French actress who broke up Daddy’s first marriage – taught me.

  I like what I see on Robert’s face and how warm his look makes me feel from my head to my toes. That look is the same one every guy I’ve ever known gives Ari when he sees her for the first time. No one ever notices me, when she’s around. It’s like I don’t exist.

  Tonight, I do. I kinda like the feeling.

  “Want another one?” Robert asks, motioning to my empty drink.

  I don’t remember drinking it down so fast, but I nod eagerly. He takes the cup, and our fingers brush. I feel warm and fluttery.

  “I need your ID,” he says. “Never seen any bartenders like these.”

  I dig it out and hand it to him. He takes it and walks to the bartender. I watch. He talks to some other guy as he waits in line, probably one of his friends. I stare at his tight ass and long, lean legs. What a difference a couple of years make! He doesn’t seem to recognize me, though, which isn’t much of a surprise. If Ari isn’t drawing the attention of the guys I’m interested in, my mother is. I’ve been stuck in the background my whole life.

  Struck by an idea, I pull my cell phone free and snap a pic of his backside to send to Ari, who is a fan of a man with a perfect butt. My fingers are clumsy, the effect of drinking, and I giggle as I mash up the words in my text to her. I finish finally and hit send just as Robert returns with a drink.

  “Here you go, Julie. Long island ice tea,” he says and hands me the drink and ID.

  I stare at him blankly, about to correct him for calling me Julie. Then I glance at the ID and remember.

  “Will the most beautiful girl here walk towards the garden with me?” he asks.

  “Garden?”

  He points. For the first time, I notice the makeshift barrier acting as a wall behind the bartender. I sip my drink and nod. Robert holds out his hand. Thrilled, I take it, and we walk into the dark garden.

  I trip at the spot where the cement around the pool ends and the uneven stones of the garden path begin. Robert catches me in his arms and suddenly, he’s kissing me. He shoves his tongue into my mouth, and I almost gag. He tastes like whiskey; I hate whiskey! I barely stop my drink from spilling and wonder what Ari does when this happens. Do men usually move so fast with her?

  “Sorry,” he says and lifts his head. “I’ve wanted to do that to you since I saw you standing there, all sexy and alone.”

  “You think I’m sexy?” My irritation is gone at his words. I’ve been called a lot of things, but never sexy! I’ve never had a real boyfriend, because most of them fear Daddy or are drawn in by Ari.

  “Uh, huh. And you’re beautiful,” Robert says. He takes my free hand and twirls me around a few times.

  I laugh. The worlds inside and outside of me are spinning, and I feel giddy.

  “Short dress, that ass.” He wraps his arms around me as he talks and pulls my backside against his body. I can feel his arousal against my butt, and it’s a total turn on. “Makes me want to do all sorts of things to you.”

  My heart beats hard. I’m not ready to lose my virginity to some drunk I just met, but I love the way his words make me feel. Mom told me of the special power a woman has on men, and I’ve watched her leave an entire room full of men drooling. So this is what it feels like to be as beautiful as her. I always envied her so bad.

  I wriggle against him then laugh and move away. I love knowing he wants me – and I have no intention of letting him have me. I stumble again and my drink falls from my hand and lands near my feet, drenching my new shoes.

  “Dammit,” I mutter.

  “What’s wrong?” he asks, taking my arm.

  “I dropped my drink.”

  “Wait here. I’ll get you another.”

  He doesn’t wait for me to agree, and I grin at his dark shape as he moves back towards the lighted area. He’s a gentleman. I’m not sure any of the guys Ari toyed with would go back for another drink.

  As I wait, my eyes adjust to the darkness of the garden. What had been lumpy shapes in the poor lighting take form, and I see there’s a low hedge lining a cobblestone path lined with softly glowing bubble lamps. They look magical, like fireflies, and I’m quickly fascinated enough by them to stumble down the path. My ankle twists as my heel get stuck between stones. I don’t feel pain as my ankle flip sideways – I don’t feel anything at this point. It’s like I’ve slipped from being drunk into a dream.

  I pull off my shoes and continue to walk.

  I see a large fountain long before I can hear it over the blaring techno. My eyes can’t focus on whether the statue in its center is a man or a large fish. Or both? I blink, trying to make sense of it while alcohol confuses my senses.

  My purse is glowing. I stare at it then realize it’s the cell inside. It’s even harder to unzip it this time, and I manage to pull free the phone. Ari has texted me like, a million times. The light of the phone is too bright for my eyes, and I can’t make out any of the fuzzy words. I put it back in my wristlet and sit on the edge of the fountain.

  I love Ari to death, but I’m suddenly happy she’s not here with me. For once, I get to be the center of attention. I get the guy. Maybe this is the story I’ll tell my kids of how I met their father. At a party, where we kissed in a romantic garden and knew we’d one day be married.

  I want a huge wedding. Daddy had the kind of connections that would get us famous celebrities. I want them there instead of stodgy politicians. Have I told him that? I can’t remember. Maybe when I tell him about Robert, I –

  “There you are!”

  Robert’s voice warbles, and he has two heads. I stand too suddenly and feel like my head is going to spin off.

  “I got worried when I couldn’t find you,” Robert says and shoves a drink into my hand. He kisses me lightly and I lean into him, loving how warm he is. One of Robert’s heads separates and moves away, morphing into another person. “This is Madison. He was my roommate at college.”

  “Madison’s a girl’s name!” I giggle.

  “I get that a lot,” the guy says. I can’t see his features well, except that he’s as tall as Robert with dark hair. His body blends in with the bushes around the fountain, leaving nothing but his bobbing head.

  “Drink up,” Robert says. “Sorry I spilled your last one.”

  “So, Julie, is it?” Madison asks.

  He comes into focus and sits on the edge of the fountain, close enough for me to see his face. I don’t like his dark eyes. They’re like two holes starting at me. He doesn’t smile either, and he seems really tense for being in my happy dream.

  “Yeah,” I say. I move away from him and the fountain and take a sip.

  Madison is watching me the way Daddy watches the speeches of his opponents, like he’s waiting for them to slip up. I start to wonder if this guy knows my ID is fake. Is he an undercover cop?

  Daddy would kill me if I got caught! I’m suddenly worried this isn’t some sort of weird dream, and he knows about the fake ID in my wristlet. I have the sudden urge to throw it in the fountain then reconsider. I have to text Ari when I wake up. Realizing I’m staring at my wristlet, I drop my arm and see the two guys hunched over something. I get closer. A leather case and … needles? Robert holds out his arm and shoves something shiny into the crook of his elbow.

  “You want one?” Madison asks as I lean closer to see. He holds out the case.

  The leather is dark brown, and it reminds me of …

  “Do you play football, too, Madison?” I ask.

  Robert breathes out hard. Madison nods at me then takes what’s in Robert’s hand. One of them mumbles about already taking a drug test or something before Robert turns to me.

  “You wanna shoot up with us?” he asks. “It’ll make you feel awesome.”

  My drink starts to slip, and I barely catch it. I take a huge drink, crunch on ice then on something weird. Chalky. Whatever it is, it tastes nasty. I spit it out then chug and spit another mouthful of alcohol to get the taste out of my mouth.
/>   “Everything okay?” Robert asks.

  “Yeah. Something weird in my drink.”

  “What do you mean?” Madison asks.

  “I don’t know.” I dump my drink and toss the cup at the bushes. “Just tastes funny.”

  “Oh, I’m feelin’ it already, Madison,” Robert says. He has a loopy grin on his face and looks like he’s enjoying my dream more now.

  He wraps his arms around me again. He kisses me, and I don’t even notice the taste of whiskey. I kiss him back. We both giggle, and he sweeps me around in a clumsy dance that almost ends with both of us falling. Instead, we laugh hard and steady one another, and he kisses me again.

  I forget all about creepy Madison as my caged hormones takeover. I never knew what it was like to want someone as much as I do Robert. He pushes me against a tree, and his hands are everywhere, squeezing my ass, touching my breasts.

  The world goes dark, as if I blinked and got stuck there, like the dream is over and I’m about to wake up.

  When my eyes open, I’m sitting on a bench on the opposite side of the fountain. I feel like I’m falling. I push Robert away to try to catch myself and stare at him. He looks like Madison. No, wait, he is Madison.

  Am I drunk or dreaming? I hear techno music and begin to think this isn’t a dream. I look around. Robert is standing near the fountain, and Madison beside me. I don’t remember seeing them move.

  “I think I should go,” I say and wobble to my feet. “Ari will be-”

  “C’mon, stay a little longer,” Robert begs and wraps his arms around me. “Stay with me.”

  “No, I feel kinda sick,” I say and try to push him away.

  “It’ll pass,” he says, holding me tight. “I promise. Just a few minutes, and you’ll feel better. Promise. Madison and I will make sure you’re okay.”

  “Okay,” I mumble, not at all certain I could find my way through the garden anyway.

  He kisses me hard this time, and his fingers unzip my dress. His hand touches my breast.